Of Hermit Crabs and Decapitation

Q. What do decapitation, scary kids, hotels, non-profit organizations, hermit crabs, lustful passion, china dolls, and a river have in common?
A. Each one of those things had a role in my dream last night, or should I say early this morning.

It was really quite weird; I’m talking bizzaro land here people. Have you ever had one of those dreams where nothing really makes sense but upon waking you remember it so clearly that you could swear it was real? Then, as the day goes on you begin to analyze the various elements only to find that each one has some point of significance. Strange as it may sound I was able to place all the pieces into some portion of my actual daily life, yes, even the decapitation (I’ve been watching Buffy again). The hermit crabs were a bit of a stretch but I think I was associating them with R’s snails in his aquarium. My guess is that I was hungry because, in my dream, I was supposed to eat these things. There they were on these platters like you get from Kroger, with a nice plastic cover. At first, I thought they were snails but then when I took the lid off they all sprouted legs and began to walk away. I remember thinking, “Great, there goes dinner. Now what am I supposed to do?” My Freudian diagnosis is that I wanted to eat something but the thought of consuming snails was just too gross for my delicate brain so instead, they just got up and walked away. I did hunt them down for a while but to no avail. That’s when the hotel and non-profit took over, (they were questioning me about the decapitated body). All in all it was very strange, throughout the remainder of the dream every now and then, one or two of the hermit crabs would pop up and I would think, “Oh, there’s one I need to get it” but I never had the means of catching it. They all ended up heading back to the river, it was an odd sensation.

Should I go into the decapitation? I don’t know man, that was a bit on the scary side. I fear that if I were to tell all I may end up in the loony bin. Let’s just suffice to say that I didn’t do it; I was only a witness but the moral of the story is…never, never let children play with sharp implements while cuddling with your lover and…you cannot replace a real head with a china doll’s head and make the human body function normally. From that point on…it’s all hermit crabs man. Anyone else want a snack?